Tips for Idiots

If you’re going to be an idiot, it helps if you’re at least an early-rising idiot.

That way, when you get up at 6 AM and see that the world is being taken over by Daring Bakers bearing lavash crackers with all manner of vegan, gluten-free dips, spreads, and salsas, and you slap your forehead and realize that yes, it’s that day and you’re caught not only lavash-less but lavash-plan-less, well, you still might have time to pull something together before you get caught up in the rest of your day.

It helps to have a few other things on your side.

Like that your lovely hosts Natalie (Gluten A Go Go) and Shel (Musings From the Fishbowl) have crafted a challenge that is fun and delicious (and yeasted in the bargain!) without being too time-intensive.

And that you’re spending the weekend in a minimalist kitchen, away from your fairly well-stocked pantry. No need to waste precious time deciding whether you’ll top your lavash with sesame seeds, chipotle, nigella seeds, amaranth, poppy seeds, zaatar… The cupboard contains salt, pepper, quinoa. For the accompaniment, you have a few vegetables at your disposal: garlic, eggplant, grape tomatoes, jalapeno pepper, baby zucchini. Decision easy: roasted vegetable dip it is.

One more thing: when you’re caught without a rolling pin, it helps that you’re never, ever without a bottle of wine in the house.

The lavash recipe can be found at our hosts‘ blogs. Here’s the dip recipe (if you can call it that):

Ingredients:

  • Some roasted vegetables. (I used 1 1/2 heads of garlic, two small Japanese eggplants, a couple of handfuls of grape tomatoes, four baby zucchini, and one jalapeno pepper.)
  • Some seasonings. (I used salt, lemon juice, and ground coriander.)

Method:

  1. Puree the pulpy vegetables (in my case, the garlic, skinned eggplant, and skinned pepper) in a food processor.
  2. Coarsely chop the other vegetables (zucchini) or leave them whole (grape tomatoes).
  3. Season to taste.

CommentsLeave a comment

  1. says

    Susan,
    I have a recipe for lavash that would go great for those vegetables, but I am on a rye trip right now!(lets say, it’s all your fault!) You could try the pide I posted though, and when I get a chance I will do my friend from Turkey’s dürüm lavas.

  2. says

    The quinoa on top is too funny. Did it add anything to the taste? I love using leftover roasted vegetables for dip. Commendable last minute effort I’d say.

  3. Kristen says

    I laughed out loud when I saw your rolling pin. When I lived in Russia in the mid-1990s I could not find a rolling pin anywhere. Alcohol, however, is most plentiful there. So, I used an old vodka bottle as my rolling pin. Also, lavash is plentiful there due to the Armenian population. Any time I visit, I eat tons of the stuff. Ah, you brought back memories x2 with this post!

  4. says

    Ha, I woke up to the exact same realization. I casually checked my google reader feed, and low and behold, all my favorite DBers (including wildyeast of course) had posted their lavash. Luckily my crackers came together easily while the kids napped.

  5. kitten says

    great job.. you are so dedicated ! i have to say i am impressed because i don’t know if i could have pulled that off. the wine bottle worked perfectly !

  6. says

    So many ways and so many problems can be solved with wine bottles! I got surprised by this date too, it just suddenly was the 27th. I had planned to do it twice but it just didn’t happen.
    You got beautiful lavash, thin & crisp!! And your dip is a favorite of mine.

  7. says

    Great post, and a great improvised rolling pin! I’m so impressed that you managed to create beautiful crackers and a fantastic dip with such limited resources. Bravo!

  8. says

    well now you can say that adrenaline and stress are positive :)
    Your rolling pin is very fun :) I’ve already used a bottle to roll dough, and for sure that’s not the perfect tool !
    Congratulations, this was a real challenge this time !

  9. says

    Wow – amazing job, especially since it was last minute! Your dip sounds so yummy – and I agree, way more important to always have a bottle of wine in the house than a rolling pin!

  10. says

    Loved your post. I was married for 4 years before I actually got a rolling pin so I really love the bottle of wine! I actually stooped to having to use a cucumber once. Ahhhh good times!

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